Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas Everyone !! =)
Yesterday was Christmas Eve ..
I took 2 days off cuz I wanted to go out at night .. LOL
Went to pyramid yesterday ..
Saw lots of santa ! =P
Wanted to catch a movie with him but all the movies were fully booked !
Postponed to today ..
I don't know whats on that mind ..
Complicated and difficult to understand ..
I will never understand ..
Feel like as thought everything is just fake ..
I know .. I sound silly ..
But I really don't know which is the truth ..
Trust but can't be trusted ..
Then what am I suppose to do ?
Nothing and act like a freaking idiot .

Doesn't mean that every time we argue means that I don't sayang you ..
I still do as always and I know you do as well ..
I might be stubborn at times ..
But I still listen to you ..
I hope you do as well ..
LOL ! I am crapping too much ..
All I want to say is that no matter how much we argue, you are still that someone that no other people can replace .. =)

Tomorrow morning I'll be getting a very nice and pampered feeling again .. =)
Been getting it for the past few days .. Thanks to ChOu ChOu .. =P But now, leg damn tired .. Why ? The safety shoes are so damn freaking heavy and is too big for my leg ! Is like as though I tied a stone onto my leg and drag them along to work .. Sigh .. =(

Pity my leg please .. =(

It doesn't mean that when things aren't going the way it was planned it means cancel .. No ?
You never bother about how I feel do you ?
Have you ever wondered how much I wanted this ?
Have you ever wondered why do I want all this ?
Have you ever stand in my shoes and feel how I feel now ?
Have you ever thought of me ?
I wanted all this is because with it I feel that I am important to you .
But to you all this is just nothing .
Nothing important at all .
Perhaps I am thinking too much of being the important one and being the one you care about .
If I do think too much, please tell me .
Thank you and sorry .

=)

Thanks ..
For the time and money and effort and everything to put things the way they are now ..
I just can't stop saying how much I like the way things are now ..
Thanks for doing so much of things for me just to put that smile on my face ..
I know I act silly sometimes that's why you always call me silly >_<"
Thanks again ..
For the time you spent with me watching a not-so-nice movie and not complaining about it ..
and
For everything =)

Smile

Sometimes I feel that it is better that I do not know anything about that someone ..
Since the time she changed her blog address, I find myself being happier ..
I know, sometimes I do wonder what she writes and all ..
But come to think of it, not knowing is better than knowing ..
Cause when I don't know I will not bother about it ..
And when I don't bother, we do not argue over it ..
No arguments ! Isn't that good ? :)
I am happy being with who I am with now ..
And I know this is going to last no matter who or what comes in between ..
Why ? Cause I've been through too many things with this special person and I know he is someone very important to me ..
I know not every relationships are always sweet and loving ..
There are some ups and downs ..
But whatever it is, I know you will always be there for me ..
Just like how I will always be there for you from now until many many more years to come ..
Thank you ..

Just For You

Always Be My Baby

We were as one babe
For a moment in time
And it seemed everlasting
That you would always be mine

Now you want to be free
So I'm letting you fly
Cause I know in my heart babe
Our love will never die
No!

You'll always be a part of me
I'm a part of you indefinitely
Girl don't you know you can't escape me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby
And we'll linger on
Time can't erase a feeling this strong
No way you're never gonna shake me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby

I ain't gonna cry no
And I won't beg you to stay
If you're determined to leave girl
I will not stand in your way
But inevitably you'll be back again
Cause ya know in your heart babe
Our love will never end no

You'll always be a part of me
I'm part of you indefinitely
Girl don't you know you can't escape me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby
And we'll linger on
Time can't erase a feeling this strong
No way you're never gonna shake me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby

I know that you'll be back girl
When your days and your nights get a little bit colder oooohhh
I know that, you'll be right back, babe
Ooooh! baby believe me it's only a matter of time

You'll always be a part of me
I'm part of you indefinitely
Girl don't you know you can't escape me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby
And we'll linger on
Time can't erase a feeling this strong
No way you're never gonna shake me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my my baby....

You'll always be a part of me (you will always be)
I'm part of you indefinitely
Girl don't you know you can't escape me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby
And we'll linger on (we will linger on....)
Time can't erase a feeling this strong
No way you're never gonna shake me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby

Always be my baby

I admit I don't have many friends like you do ..
Why do you even bother anyway ?
Is my life ..
I can choose who I want in my life ..
And if that person want or do not want to be in it also have got nothing to do with you ..
But I'll definately not choose you :)
So why do you even bother to know who is in it and who is not ?
Sometimes I just don't understand you ..
I do what I want in my life ..
You do what you want in yours ..
And who say I was talking about you all this while ?
I guess you over reacted a lil bit :)
But nevermind .. You are the way you are :)

YOU !

You are the most annoying human that I've ever met !
No one in this world that I have met have you attitude !
If I can, I would have already slapped you !
If you think you are damn smart and that you can win everyone and get everything you want then I am sorry .. You will be the one losing everything and everyone at the end !
If you want to act like the way you are now don't act in front of me !
If you cross the limit I will give you a nice one !
Who cares who you are and who is supporting you ?!
I don't give a damn !
Stupid annoying asshole !

FUCK YOU !

THIS IS MY BLOG !!
WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU EVEN CARE ?!!?
WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT SOME MORE ?!
KNNCCB !
YOU COME AND VIEW MY BLOG FOR NUTS ?!
I WANT TO VIEW BUT DID I MENTIONED ANYTHING ABOUT YOU TO ANYONE ELSE ?!
NO RIGHT ?!!?!
THEN WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU EVEN BOTHER ?!
FUCKING BITCH !

I Don't Know What The Title Should Be

Once again I am confused .
This always happens when you are not by my side .
Why ?
I guess is because I am confused yet afraid .
When I was there today, I asked you one question .
"Who are you texting ?"
Then you replied " Her "
I don't know if you realised that I was upset after that and turned away .
I was really upset .
But when I think of it properly, now that I am nothing to you .
I shouldn't be upset .
I should be happy instead because you are happy with her .
No matter how we will turn out to be in the future, I did hope that you will be happy as always .
I know I disturbed your conversation with her today .
Sorry is all I can say .
I don't know why did you followed me to the hospital today .
Maybe is just to make me happy .
Or maybe because u pitied me .
Whatever reason it is, I don't think is that you love me .
You've never said it since 2 weeks back .
I just hope I get an answer as soon as possible .
I really don't want to be in this kind of situation .
But I don't want you to wait for me to say it out then you tell me what your decisions are .
I just hope everything between all of us will be over as soon as possible .
Now that you have to spend time with both, I don't know who is more important .
I am seriously lost .
I am seriously going crazy for real this time .

Thanks

Thanks ..
Even though I am very confused at this moment ..
But I think I am not the only one ..
I guess you are too ..
But after this, I really hope you know what you want and work it out ..
At least then I'll know how important this is to you .. and me ..
Right now, I think you are as confused as I am ..
Or maybe it is just me ..
Hopefully everything will be known very soon ..
But for now, thanks .. For everything ..
I appreciate it a lot =)

27th of October . The day that I dislike most .

I can't believe that I actually cried while I was having my lunch today ..
I can't believe that you were leaving without letting me know earlier ..
I can't believe that you won't be here for me to hug and cry when I am sad ..
I can't believe that I won't be able to see you anymore ..
You are the first that I've loved so much ..
I am going to miss you badly ..
I love you ..
And always will ..

To ChOu ChOu

At this time of last year you were far away from me, wishing that we were together to celebrate this special day of yours ..
At this time of the last year I still remember you told me you were happy with the present that has been given to you ..
At this time of last year I really thought that this day would never come ..
But it actually did ..
I am glad that you are a part of me now ..
Giving me laughter and joy ..
Not forgetting the tears that came out from us because of the fear of loosing each other ..
Not forgetting people who came in and out of our lives doing endless things ..
No matter what happens between us in the future, I always hope that you will be there for me ..
And together we will celebrate this special day of yours next year and many more years to come ..

Happy Birthday Baby ..

<3 you as always =)

Thursday, 16th October 2008

Tomorrow off day =D
I am so happy cause I worked like a mad woman today !
They soaked all the cutlery and plates !
They even covered everything in the whole restaurant because they were soaking all the stuff ..
So those who did the opening of the restaurant today need to put everything back to place + QA + Opening floor ..
And today we have people on leave therefore, not enough staff ._."
Talking about not enough staff at the wrong time ~_~"
I shouldn't be talking about work now because .. I am off tomorrow =P
Don't know what is the plan tomorrow .. But I am sure I have a lot of time with PiGu ChOu ChOu !
For now, Good Night !

Open QA = DAMN TIRING !!

Start work at 9am today ..
And today was my first time opening the QA ..
What is QA ?
Is a place where all the food and everything is being checked before serving it to the customer ..
Before the restaurant opens, everything in the QA has got to be in place so that it will be faster and easier for the food to be sent out ..
In the morning, who ever who does the opening have to take out all the gravy, soups and sauces from the fridge and heat everything up and then check it with the blue color thermometer like thingy .. *is called bio something*
If the gravy or sauce or soup is not up to 170F, then it has got to be re-heated ..
Then the person has got to on all the warmer .. make sure the chips and everything is in place ..
Make sure the plate and knives and spoons are in place ..
Make sure that there is back up for everything ..
If there is no backup, then you have to get it and label everything according to the life spend of the thing ..
Then the person has got to make coffee (2 decanter) and boil water (3 decanter) then send 1 coffee and water to the bar ..
The by the time you finish everything ..
Is almost 11.30am ._.
Then you'll have your 15minutes break and then lunch time = serving time = busy time ._.
By the time you were so busy walking and serving and taking orders in the restaurant , when everything slows down, its already 2.30 - 3pm ..
Later at 4pm, there will be customers again ..
Coming in for happy hour ..
Then .. is time for me to go home ! 5pm ! =)
Today was the first day where I felt like as though I've walk 10km !!
My leg .. *Ouch*
Now, is 8.40pm .. Is time for me to go to bed ..
I've work at 9am tomorrow ._.
I just hope I don't have to open QA again ..
I'll cause havoc again and I'll be dead tired !! =S
Good Night ~ ZzzZZzzz

*Thanks ChOuChOu for everything ^^*

Chili's Staff Party

No work today ..
All Chili's outlets were closed due to the staff party at FRIM today ..
Met with the others at 9am outside Mid Valley and then sat the bus all the way to FRIM ..
The staff party started out with food and drinks and then later we had team games ..
It was fun but tiring .. *imagine playing games under the hot sun*
Met Kree Kree ..
I was enjoying myself under the canopy with fan laughing at Kree Kree trying to grab hold of one ball each in both her arms and legs while trying to talk across .. =P
Then later they had nature walk which I didn't go because of my leg ..
The guide told us that is it going to be slippery and there will be leeches ..
Imagine with my leg like that and suddenly a leech just stick itself there and start sucking my blood from the wound .. *ouch*
We left FRIM about 5+pm ..
Someone told me *I think it was Nirmala* that even working days are not as tiring as today ..
Talk about work ..
I have mine at 9am tomorrow ..
Ciao !

p/s: for the human who thinks that I am writing about her and that I am writing on her blog , please check the IP if u can and if u notice, that person and I have a different IP. kthxbye.

Please Don't

Please don't take him away from all of us .
We love him too much to let him go .
He will be strong and he love being here .
Please don't take him away .
I thank You for not taking him away .

Lazy

I am lazy to talk about you now .
I have no time for you .
Wait until I settle everything which is FAR more important than you then I will come back to you .
For now, I will just leave you to write shit and nuts in you stupid space !
Bye ! =)

You Can Do It！！

Lots of things happen these few days ..
But whatever that happens, have got nothing to do with ChOu ChOu and also you (the-you-know-who-you-are) ..
But I thank ChOu ChOu for being there ..
For the shoulder and the ears ..
<3 you as always =)
No matter how tough this problem is, I am willing to go through it ..
I do not want this problem to fade away ..
I just wanted it to not even existed ..
But since it has already existed, I want it to stay ..
Because when this problem starts fading away, I will lose someone which I love and treasure very much ..
Daddy, no matter what, we will go through this as a family ..
We will always be there to support you ..
That's what family is here for ..
We all love you and we will go through this together ..
We will always love and support you ..
Be strong ..
You can do it !
加油！！

The special someone

This special someone have always been there for me since the day I was born ..
This special someone is one of the few who never left me in any difficulties ..
This special someone is the one who I have many happy and memorable moments with ..
This special someone is the one who always make sure that I am safe ..
This special someone is one of the few who make me feel that I am home no matter where we are ..
This special someone is the one who thought me how to be independent ..
This special someone is the one who thought me not to be selfish .. ( In a hard way which I can remember until now)
This special someone is the one who thought me how to be who I am today ..
This special someone is the one has given me everything that I have today ..
Without you, I will not be who I am now ..
Without you, I will not have what I have now ..
I don't know what I will be without you ..
You walked beside me and guide me through my difficulties ..
Now that you have your difficulties, all I can do is just to watch you go through it ..
I can't do anything ..
I am sorry Daddy ..
But no matter what, I love you .

Chili's, ChOu and an Annoying Human Being

Just got back from work ..
Damn tired ..
Stand whole day ..
Walk whole day ..
Serve whole day ..
Went to Maybank today ..
zzz! They told me I can't open an account cause they have a lot of people waiting for the ATM card ..
Was asked to come back the next day ..
Annoying !
____________________________________________________________________

ChOu ChOu came during my lunch break today .. =D
He wasn't happy .. =(
Cuz I was rushing ..
Making it like as tho I have no time for him ..
Sigh ..
I wish I have more time for you .. =S
I am sorry ..
After break, he went for a movie while I worked till 5 then met up with him and went back together ..
____________________________________________________________________

Btw, someone is still visiting my blog .. LOL !
Yaya .. Yes yes .. I still read yours ..
Whatever !
Looks like you care a lot about what I say .. LOL
Don't know you lah ..
Say you annoying also you get offended ..
Then what you want ?
You don;t expect everyone to like you right ?
Especially me ..
How can I like you after all the trouble you have given me ?
Somemore adding me on MSN before this for no effing reason !
I memang like to 批评 you ..
You notice it too .. Not bad =)

Annoying

Some people just like being a pain in the ass ..
I just don't understand why ..
Is like people are happy with what they have and because you don't have it you have to make a big fuss and try to destroy what other people is having .
Why ?
Because of jealousy ?
Because you love doing so ?
Or because you can't get what you want ?
Don't you think that you are being just nothing but a pain to everyone else especially the one who you are doing it to ?
I just don't get it .
If you can't choose to let go they why did you pick that thing up at first ?
Such a pain .
I am so tired of you .
Annoying P-E-S-T !!

Heal Pleaseeeeeeeeeeeee ~

ChOu ChOu is coming back tomorrow ! =P
I am suppose to be happy .. No ? xD
______________________________________________________________________

Starting work on Monday ..
I am feeling kinda lazy now .. Thinking that I have to go for training for about 1 or 2 weeks .. Serving people later on .. Taking orders .. Bla Bla Bla ..
But .. Is Chili's !
I mean .. it should be nice working there .. No ? =P
Hopefully my leg recover soon enough ..
At least I can walk with lesser pain ..
And also my shoulders ..
Please heal faster ..
I need to work =(

Sorry is all that I can say

All I can say now is sorry ..
I don't know what else I can say to make u feel better ..
I know I hurt u ..
But the way you are acting back at home hurts me as well ..
I felt left out ..
I felt being not important ..
I felt that everything comes before me ..
Sigh ..
I hope you'll be here for me at all times ..

On my way home ..

Today on my way back from my aunt's house after dinner ..

Sis : Looked up at the dark sky and notice blue, red lights blinking and said jokingly .. "JIE !! LOOK !! UFO !! "

Me: Yeah right lah ! UFO your head !!

Sis: Eih ! I am serious lah wei !! Really !! Is really UFO !!

Me: Stop crapping lah !

Sis: REALLYYYYY !! You don't believe you come and see !! FASTER come and SEE !!

Me: *Went towards the window at her side and looked up at the sky*
"Where ? Where ? I don't see anything !!"

Sis: Eh ! Is just an aeroplane ! AHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA ! *laugh loudly*

Me: Stupid lah you ! *went back to my place*

Parents: What happened ? What are you all laughing at ??

Me: That meimei lah ! Simply say she say UFO !

Parents: *laughed LOUDLY*

Sis: What?!?? I was joking at first ! Then later I really thought it is a UFO ! Since when aeroplane has BLUE and RED lights on it !!

Parents & I: *Laughed loudly at my silly sister*

***Mei ah Mei ... You are such a funny person when you are sleepy + blur + stress + I-don't-know-what-else-more ! =P ***

INTERVIEW !! =D

Went for an interview today ..
The interviewer was not bad ..
He told us (Kree and I) about his experienced and all ..
I think it should be fun working in an advertising agency/group/company ..
Lots of exposure ..
Get to know more people who are related to what I am studying ..
Then at least I know what does the clients and etc wants ..
Hopefully I get to go through the 2nd and also 3rd interview and get the job ..
I don't want to stay and rot at home anymore .. T_T
______________________________________________________________________

Went to Mid Valley after the interview with Kree to eat ..
Then met Apan later ..
I bought a wallet for ChOuChOu ..
His wallet is making all the cards especially his ATM card crooked !
Then he will not be able to withdraw money from the ATM machine .. =(
Hopefully this wallet will keep his card from being bent everytime he sits down .. xP

Why is it so Hard ?

Like what the tittle says, Why is it so hard ?
Why is it so hard for the other half to be truthful ?
Why do you have to hide everything from them ?
Have you ever thought that when you lie to them and when they find out everything by themselves it will hurt them even more ?
Why can't people just tell the truth ?
Especially you .
Is it so hard to tell me everything ?
If it is, then I will not ask you anymore questions from now onwards .
I prefer not knowing than to find out later that you are actually lying to me .
That's all for now .
Not in a mood to blog, text or answer calls from you .
Bye.

BORED after 3 days of the 3 months HOLIDAY

I am so effing BORED !!
Can anyone please safe me from this boring holiday ?!
I want a job !
I want a job !
I WANT A JOB !
Anyone can help me pweeaassse ? =(
This holiday is so sad ..
I only have my Brownie to accompany me ..
ChouChou ah ChouChou ..
Come back faster lah ..
Sang mo gu already lar ..
Mo gu

Job Needed !!

I need a job !
Or I'll rot at home and my coursemates won't be able to see me in January 2009 !!
Went to www.jobstreets.com.my to look for job in the field that I am currently studying in ..
Managed to find a few companies that were looking for internships ..
I applied a few of them ..
Hopefully I'll get response soon ..
I want to work !
I am going to rot at home!!

HELPPPPPPPPPPPPPP !!

Bla ..

Was text-ing a few people today about how I felt today .
Imagine someone suddenly came into your life out of no where and starts thinking that as thought she isn't bothering someone's life. I did thought of letting everything go.
Why ?
Cause that person was being so annoying . *is not like she is not now. She still is annoying*
Like what I said before , if I were to continue being in this situation that I am in now , I will undergo depression very soon and then I will die drowning in my tears .
Who wants all those things to happen to themselves, right ?
That is why, I've decided on giving up.
Then later I was talking to a friend online .
A friend who I met online which turns out to be a good friend =)
Thank you Summer ~
I was telling her about my problems .
I told her that if I did continue being where I am I am going to be depressed.
Then she said "No.. Not soon .. You are already depressed."
LOL ! Am I really depressed?
Now that I am thinking with my head and not my heart, does this person really worth all my tears.
If she do, why?
Because she came out from no where and causing havoc in my life? I shouldn't be depressed for that miserable person .. No?
But again, I wasn't using my head earlier .
So yeah.. I cried.. =P
Then later while I was curling myself in bed with tears, I wanted to talk to someone.
Just that one.
I waited awhile for the tears to stop.
Then I called.
First thing after I said "Hello" the first sentence which I heard from him was ,
"Why are you crying ?! What happened ?!"
Tears started flowing down my cheek .
Again .
All I answered was ,
"I don't know."
He thought I was hiding things from him .
Then he told me about something which would make me happier .
Then he told me not to think too much and that everything would be fine .
After that call, is like the sun after the rain.
Skies got brighter, sun started shinning.
I felt a lot better after that call.
Thank you.
For the love and comfort.
That's all that I need at that moment. =) <3 you .

Why lah Why ?

If you are reading my blog ..
Why do you have to keep viewing my profile ?
Why Why ?
Does it even concern you where I go and who I am being with ?
I thought you say you are giving up ?
Then why do you even bother ?
Is he holding on to you ?
Can you just make my life happier by moving on ?
You are giving me nothing but tears every now and then ..
Endless arguments ..
Endless tears ..
Endless heartaches ..
Sleepless nights !
Do you know how much of trouble you are causing me ?
Focus on what you are doing would you ?
Whatever I do have got nothing to do with you ..
If you are unhappy with what I am doing and who I am out with, talk to me..
I will settle it with you !
I can't stand you being here to cause me nothing but all those stupid troubles that you giving me !

Sunday, 21st September 2008

L - R : Dragon fruit juice , Sour Plum juice

Went and have a drink before Mamma Mia that day ..
I ordered the drink on the left while he ordered the drink on the right ..
It looks good doesn't it ?
It only looks good .. Trust me ..
You wouldn't want to drink it ..
The one on the left tasted like unripe dragon fruit mixed with the sour mandarin orange peel which people eat when they feel like puke-ing ..
The one on the right taste very sour cause they put in lime, sour plum, and i think i taste sour mandarin orange peel too !
End up ordering another mineral water because they don't taste as good as it looks ..
Sad Sad Sad ~

But 2 things that were wonderful that day ..
1 - I get to watch Mamma Mia
2 - The best part, I love the person who accompanied me that day !! You always put a smile on my face when I am upset .. Thanks =)

Lost Lost Lost

Which is the truth ?
Who is telling the truth ?
Who am I suppose to believe in ?
Even I myself can't tell ..
Why can't people just tell the truth rather than hurting people around them and making them suffer ?
Sigh ..

=(

ChOu ChOu going back on Monday ..
Don't know when will he be coming back ..
Promised me that it won't be long ..
Not for a week ..
That's what he told me ..
Can't wait for this coming week to pass ..
Once is passed, that means ChOu ChOu is back .. =D

Please pass quickly T_T *although it haven't started, but I wish it has already ended*

家好月圆-Moonlight Resonance

家好月圆

I am currently addicted to this movie !
Why ?
Because this show is just soooooooooooooooooooooooo NICE！
I cried ..
I laughed ..
Final episode this Sunday !!
DumDumDeeDumDumDumDeeDumDum ~
Yes, I am nuts ..
Thank you ! =)

昨天, 又跟他吵架了。
都怪我不好，为了一些小小的事跟他吵。
搞到要分手了。
如果没有她的出现会跟好吗？
为什么天天都是为了她呢？
我又试过不要理她的，但是我做不到。
为了你，她什么都可以做的。
我真的好怕

Exams

Exam has already started ..
Was busy during the study week as I have my assignments to complete ..
Not assignments but just one ..
Advertising Design 2 .. The marks wasn't that bad .. I am quite happy with the marks after so much of work .. =P
So .. the first paper was Advertising Design 2 .. 3 hours paper ! Not too tough .. I still manage to answer the questions but the sketching question was a lil tricky .. When I walked out of the exam hall, I see many people doing different things .. Whatever it is .. What is done is done .. Can't do anything about it ..
Second paper was English for Mass Communication .. Question 1 killed almost everyone !! Literature Review .. Some took 1 1/2 hours to complete .. I took 1 hour .. Reading the 2 articles is like putting me to bed during exam ! Question 2 and 3 was ok .. Not too bad .. Very much easier as compared to the first one ..
The next paper is my Chinese paper .. Is very basic chinese .. But I am still gonna die for it cause I don't know how to write ! Hooray ~! =D
After Chinese is my last paper .. Digital Photography .. which I heard is quite tough ..

Anyway, all the best to those who will be taking their exams .. =)

WHY ?!!?!!

Why do you have to go through all my stuff ?!!?!?
Why do you have to ask every question in the world ?!!?!?
Why do you want to know about every single thing I do ?!!?
Why do you not know how to open your mouth and ask instead of hinting things to me ?!!?

You know why am I not honest with you ?!!?
Is because you never trusted me !!
Is because you never let me choose what I want to do !!
Is because you never believe in what I am doing !!

Now you tell me, why must I be honest and truthful to you when you are not even trusting me !

Is it my fault that I want to do what I am doing now ?!
Is it my fault for choosing my own future instead of you telling me what to do ?!
Is it my fault for being mad at you for every little things that you do ?!

I am your daughter, not your puppet !!
If you don't believe in me then tell it straight to my face !
I am so sick of you wearing your mask in front of me !
Sick and tired of it !

Now you know why I don't feel like talking to you and get irritated easily don't you ?

不知道为什么

不知道为什么，当你不在我身边的时候，我会乱想。
希望你永远倒在我身边，
永远倒陪着我，
因为我真的好爱你。
不要你离开我。

Thoughts

Have you ever wonder, how much are you willing to give in for the one you love ?
I've heard that some people would die for the one they love ..
I've also heard that some people will just leave the one they love for what they have always wanted ..
As for me .. I think loving someone doesn't mean that you have to be together with that person .. As long as the one that you love is happy then you will be happy .. No ?
I thought of letting go many times of the one I love .. Why ?
Because there is that one person out there who loves him more that I do .. Or at least I think that she does ..
With every word of hers that I read .. I feel that I am being the wicked and cold- hearted one to separate the both of them .. It was said that they love each other .. is just someone is stuck in between the both of them .. which in this case .. it means me ..
Should I really give up and start moving on so that they will have a happier life ? Or should I continue being the one in between and see them suffer ?
I am confused .. As one tells me something and the other one tells me a different story ..
I am so lost ..

I Feel ...

I feel that everything I do now I need your company ..
Without your company ..
I will not get the work done ..
Why?
Is it because I am too attached to you ?

When things doesn't go as the way I planned it ..
I will get upset over it ..
Why ?
Is it because I am too attached to you ?

When problem arises between you and me ..
I will get upset over it ..
Why ?
Is it because I am too attached to you ?

What am I suppose to do ?
Tell you ?
Or do I keep it to myself ?
How do I tell ?

I Miss You

I miss you ..
When will you be coming back ?
I wish you are here with me ..

O.o

Uni starting next week and results are not out yet ..
I wonder what is UTAR doing .. Keeping our results for sooooooooo long !
I am really curious about what am I gonna get .. This semester's CGPA is going to be worst as compared to foundation cause our marks depends on our assignments .. *sigh*

Next week .. The last week that I can relax before all the assignments ..

New semester = New subjects = More assignments = More work = More money spent = Less sleep = More stress !! =S

Winnie is coming back soon ! JUNE !! I am waiting for you !! Come quick ! =D

Get Well Soon

See you suffering is not what I want to see ..
Hope you will recover as soon as possible ..
So that you will be able to do what you want to do ..
Get well soon ..

Everytime We touch and I Can't Stop Loving You

I still hear your voice when you sleep next to me
I still feel your touch in my dreams
Forgive me, my weakness, but I don't know why
Without you it's hard to survive

'Cause everytime we touch, I get this feeling
And everytime we kiss, I swear I could fly
Can't you feel my heart beat fast, I want this to last
Need you by my side
'Cause everytime we touch, I feel the static
And everytime we kiss, I reach for the sky
Can't you hear my heart beat so,
I can't let you go
Want you in my life

Your arms are my castle, your heart is my sky
They wipe away tears that I cry
The good and the bad times, we've been through them all
You make me rise when I fall

'Cause everytime we touch, I get this feeling
And everytime we kiss, I swear I could fly
Can't you feel my heart beat fast, I want this to last
Need you by my side
'Cause everytime we touch, I feel the static
And everytime we kiss, I reach for the sky
Can't you hear my heart beat so,
I can't let you go
Want you in my life

'Cause everytime we touch, I get this feeling
And everytime we kiss, I swear I could fly
Can't you feel my heart beat fast, I want this to last
Need you by my side

It still feels like our first night together
Feels like the first kiss and
It's gettin' better baby
No one can better this
I'm still hold on and you're still the one
The first time our eyes met it's the same feelin' I get
Only feels much stronger and I wanna love ya longer
You still turn the fire on

So If you're feelin' lonely.. don't
You're the only one I'd ever want
I only wanna make it good
So if I love ya a little more than I should

Please forgive me I know not what I do
Please forgive me I can't stop lovin' you
Don't deny me

This pain I'm going through
Please forgive me
If I need ya like I do
Please believe me
Every word I say is true
Please forgive me I can't stop loving you
Still feels like our best times are together
Feels like the first touch

We're still gettin' closer baby
Can't get close enough I'm still holdin' on
You're still number one I remember the smell of your skin
I remember everything
I remember all your moves
I remember you
I remember the nights ya know I still do

One thing I'm sure of
Is the way we make love
And the one thing I depend on
Is for us to stay strong
With every word and every breath I'm prayin'
That's why I'm sayin'...

Exams ? Holiday ?

Exams are over ..
First paper .. Communicative English ..
Hopefully a B but I don't think thats possible .. The paper was ....

Second paper .. Advertising Design ..
Was ok .. Not too bad I guess .. Sketch Sketch and more sketches ..

Third paper was horror ! Visual Communication ..
Starts at 9am came out 45 minutes later .. Why ? Cuz I can't answer .. LOL

Fourth paper and the last paper .. Colour Studies ..
Came out 35 minutes before the paper ends ..
Someone didn't turn up for the exam .. I should have called the other number =(

Now .. Holidays ! 3 weeks !
Gonna rot at home until the new semester ..
And when the new semester bill comes .. Mum is gonna make damn a lot of noise ..
Then the camera ! Markers ! etc etc ... More noise ! *sigh*

I feel ..

I feel empty ..
Like everything is just not right ..
I feel like something is missing ..
It used to be there ..
But not anymore ..
I hate this feeling ..
I feel insecure ..
Is like everything around me will be missing soon ..
I just want this feeling to go away ..
The only way for it to go is for that thing that is missing to return ..
Which I don't think is even possible ..
I miss it very much ..
Missing it badly ..

How Fast Are You ?

61 words

Speed test

341 characters per minute
61 correct words
3 wrong words

新不了情 - Endless Love

心若倦了,
xin ruo juan le
If your heart is weary,

泪也乾了,
lei ye gan le
And your tears are all dried up.

这份心情,
zhe fen xin qing
This feeling,

难舍难了。
nan she nan liao
Is hard to relinquish or forget.


曾经拥有,
ceng jing yong you
I once used to have,

天荒地老,
tian huang di lao
All the time in the world.

已不见你,
yi bu jian ni
But I haven't seen you,

暮暮与朝朝。
mu mu yu chao chao
For many nights and many days.


这一份情,
zhe yi fen qing
This love,

永远难了,
Is forever difficult to resolve.

愿来生还能,
yuan lai sheng hai neng
I hope in our afterlife,

再度拥抱。
zai du yong bao
We can embrace again.


爱一个人,
ai yi ge ren
Loving someone,

如何斯守到老,
ru he si shou dao lao
How do you remain faithful till you're old?

怎样面对一切,
zen yang mian dui yi qie
How do you face everything,

我不知道。
wo bu zhi dao
I do not know.


回忆过去,
hui yi guo qu
Reviewing the past,

痛苦的相思忘不了,
tong ku de si xiang wang bu liao
The painful memories are unforgettable.

为何你还来,
wei he ni hai lao
Why do you come then,

拨动我心跳。
bo dong wo xin tiao
To make my heart race.

爱你怎么能了,
ai ni zen me neng liao
How is it possible to stop loving you?

今夜的你应该明了,
jin ye de ni ying gai ming liao
Tonight, you should understand,

缘难了情难了。
yuan nan liao qing nan liao.
It is difficult to escape fate, just as it is difficult to dissolve love.

Why .. ?

How much more can I take ?

How much more is there to come ?

I can't believe everything happens so fast ..

Happens and ends so soon ..

Why ?

Isn't there any other solutions to this ?

The problem that we are having is big enough that we couldn't settle ..

Why do you want to bring more people into this ?

Why ?

Why do you have to bring that someone when you know all it does it hurting me ?

Why do you want to hurt me ?

Isn't hurting me this way not enough for u ?

How much more do you want ?

What do you get out of it ?

Fun ? Joy ? Happiness ?

What are you actually thinking ?

Do you actually know what are you thinking ?

Do you actually know what do you want out of this ?

I keep asking myself why ..

Why do I hold on to this so much ?

Why do I still think that there is hope ?

Why do I love you so much ?

Why ?

Why are all my questions unanswered ?

Sigh .. I am so depressed ..




Tell me how I'm supposed to breathe with no air

If I should die before I wake

It's 'cause you took my breath away

Losing you is like living in a world with no air

OhI'm here alone, didn't wanna leave

My heart won't move, it's incomplete

Wish there was a way that I can make you understand

But how do you expect meto live alone with just me

'Cause my world revolves around you

It's so hard for me to breathe

Tell me how I'm supposed to breathe with no air

Can't live, can't breathe with no air

It's how I feel when I know you ain't there

It's no air, no air

Got me out here in the water so deep

Tell me how you gonna be without me

If you ain't here, I just can't breathe

It's no air, no air

No air, air

No air, air

No air, air

No air, air

I walked, I ran, I jumped, I flew

Right off the ground to float to you

There's no gravity to hold me down for real

But somehow I'm still alive inside

You took my breath, but I survived

I don't know how, but I don't even care

So how do you expect me to live alone with just me

'Cause my world revolves around you

It's so hard for me to breathe

No air, air

No air, air

No air, air

No air, air

No more

It's no air, no air

No air, airNo air, airNo air, airNo air, air

Aaliyah - The One I Gave My Heart To

How could the one I gave my heart to
break my heart so bad
How could the one who made me happy
make me feel so sad

Won't somebody tell me so I can understand
If you love me how could you hurt me like that

How could the one I gave my world to,
throw my world away
how could the one who said I love you
say the things you say
how could the one I was so true to
just tell me lies
how could the one I gave my heart to go and
break this heart of mine
tell me


How could you be so cold to me
when I gave you everything
all my love, all I had inside
How could you just walk out the door
how could you not love me anymore
I thought we had forever
I can't understand

How could the one I shared my dreams with
take my dream from me
How could the love that brought such pleasure
bring such misery
won't somebody tell me, somebody tell me please
If you love me how could you do that to me
tell me

Hey,
How could you just walk out the door
how could you not love me anymore
I thought we had forever
I can't understand no I can't understand

How could the one ( the one I gave my heart to)
break my heart so bad ( break my heart)
how could the one who made me happy (you made me so happy)
make me feel so sad ( make me feel so sad)
won't somebody tell me( won't you tell me)
so I can understand ( so I can understand)
If you love me how could you hurt me like that
(how could you hurt me)

How could the one I gave my world to,
throw my world away ( throw my world away)
how could the one who said I love you ( you said you love me)
say the things you say ( but you didn't love me)
how could the one I was so true to
just tell me lies ( you told me lies)
how could the one I gave my heart to
how could the one I gave my heart to
break this heart of mine

tell me

I tried ..

I tried ..

I tried very hard ..

I just can't ..

I don't have the strength to do it ..


Ever since you came into my life ..

I've learned to rely on you ..

You were where I go to when I have problems ..

You were the person I talk to ..

You were where I spend most of my time ..

Ever since you are here , I no longer stand on my

own 2 feet ..


And now when you have to leave ,

I am lost ..

I do not know what can I do ..

I do not know where can I stand ..

I do not know how to be independent and stand on my

own feet again ..


You once told me , you will always be there

whenever I need you ..

You once told me , with you by my side there is

nothing which can hurt me ..

You once told me , you will not hurt me ..

Well , at least try ..

But whatever I am going through now ,

I have to go through everything by myself ..

I am hurt more than ever ..

How much more pain can I take ?

Is like pushing me to the end of the path with no

lights to guide me

out and no air to breathe ..

I am suffocating .. I am out of air ..

How is there to help me ?

Please , help me out ..

From the tiniest thing that is around me ..
It reminds me of you ..

From things at home .. To the things outside ..
It reminds me of you ..

I don't know since when you've became such an important person in my life ..

I don't know since when you've became so influential ..

I don't know since when you've became a person which I can't live without ..

Maybe I can .. But I guess I've just chosen not to from the start ..
Therefore I can't stand on my own 2 feet ..

I no longer feel happiness ..
Even the happiest thing that happens in my life can never take away the sadness in me ..

I no longer feel that I am who I am .. Who am I now ?
What am I suppose to do to feel the way I used to ?
Where am I? I hate being where I am now .. I wish I will find my way out from this stranded place ..

Untitled

How do you feel when there are a lot of traps and things blocking the path that you are walking ?

What will you do ?

What will I do ?

What am I suppose to do ?

What can I do ?

Whatever I do, I still can't change things ..

You've gave me joy ..

You've gave me happiness ..

Too much until we can't see what is ahead of us ..

Now that we can see it right in front of our eyes, we have to choice but to go on our separate ways ..

Whatever we've been through shall remain as memories and to be kept in a box .. A box sealed and can never be open anymore ..

Even thought there are no promises of whatever that we've been through will last forever .. But I really wish it would ..

From this , I've learned that nothing in this world lasts forever ..

Get well soon

Get well soon my dear friend ..
I know you are strong enough to go through what you are going through ..
Do not give up ..
Everyone is here for you to support you ..

Complicated Thoughts

Complicated thoughts ..
A lot of things running through my mind now.. Maybe not a lot ..
Just one .. But that one , kept me thinking for a very long time ..
How will it be later ? What will the others think ? What will happen if it doesn't turn out the way it is suppose to ? What is anything goes wrong ?
I wonder what will tomorrow be like .. Hopefully everything turns out fine .. Not the way I thought it will be ..
God Bless Me ... Please ..

Let go ..

Learn to let go ...
Is easier to be said than done ..
But you will be a better person without the hurt and the pain ...
Stop holding on ...
You will feel better that way ...
I hope you will be alright soon ...
I really hope that one day will not take too long ...

Happy Chinese New Year !

Happy Chinese New Year !!!!!
GONG XI FA CAI !!
XIN NIAN KUAI LE !! =P

BUSY

Will upload soon .. When there is not much assignment ..
At this moment .. I am suffocated !!
Sorry for the lack of updates !!
=P